Candy Red Rarity
by Cactuslotus
Summary: Following the life of a strange troll named Karkat Vantas. Anything can happen! (Petstuck, some dark material much later on.)
1. Chapter 1

My name is Karkat and I'm a troll.  
I'm two sweeps old and live in what dad calls a stable. He says hoofbeasts usually live in them, but the owner of the ranch made them nicer so that they're like rooms for the trolls. I don't get why I'm not allowed out of the stable, but dad says I'm special like him. He says that now that I'm not a wiggler Mr. Egbert is going to make sure I'm health and maybe he will like me so I won't get sold, which doesn't make sense.  
I try getting him to play with me, but he just keeps watching the stable door. "Dad?" He smiles at me before going back to being boring. I climb onto his back and grab hold of the thing around his neck.  
He laughed softly. "What are you doing Karkat?"  
"I'm tuggin' on your neck thing."  
"My neck thing?"  
"Yeah. I get one?"  
"Yes. It's a collar Karkat. All trolls have to wear one by law."  
"Can mine be red too?"  
"It will be."  
"I like red." I froze as I heard something, listening closely. Dad's ears moved, listening like I was to whatever it was. I climbed into dad's lap as soon as I realized how different the sound was, like something bigger than my dad was coming. It stopped in front of the door, sliding it open to reveal the weirdest thing I've ever seen. It wasn't gray and it's eyes weren't yellow and it's ears weren't pointed.  
"Hello Mr. Egbert."  
"Hello Signless." The weird thing closed the door behind him, crouching down in front of me and smiling. He had a bag with him, reaching into it he pulled out something. "Hey there Karkat. Do you want a lollipop?" I slowly reached out and grabbed it. "How has he been?"  
"He's been great, like when Kankri was little. How is Kankri by the way?"  
"Jane tried getting him to train as a show troll, but he refuses still. It's still a little chaotic every time she tries."  
Dad laughed. "I can only imagine! I just wonder if she would try with Karkat."  
"Probably not. She has her hands full as is." The strange guy looked at me. "How are you feeling Karkat?" I clutch tight to my dad, not sure I like this strange thing.  
"It's alright Karkat."  
"Dad, is he sick?"  
"No Karkat, he's a human. They're different from trolls."  
"Where'd his horns go?"  
"Humans don't have horns."  
"Is he hiding his tail?"  
"Humans don't have tails."  
I stared at the human in shock, which only made him laugh. "Aren't you a little cutie?"  
"I'm not cute!"  
"Oh? What are you?"  
"I'm tough."  
"So you can't be cute and tough?"  
"I guess I could be."  
"Karkat, can you show me your paws?"  
"Hold up your hands too!" I hold up my hands, which were a lot like my feet. The human had hands much different from mine. They were shaped almost the same, but I had sharp nails and tough skin on my palms and on one side of my fingers. I reached out and touched his hand, which was soft and smooth. I touched his arm, which was lacking in fur. "What happened to your fur?"  
"Humans don't have fur all over like trolls."  
"What?" I touched the short fur on my arm, then touched the human's furless arm. "Why are you guys missing stuff?"  
My dad and the human laughed. "They aren't missing stuff. It's just how humans are." I would have said something else, but the door opened a bit. It was a smaller human with squares on his face around his eyes. He looked in quietly. "You didn't tell me you had another child."  
"That's because he was born two months before Karkat. You were already going into protective mode and you were very busy with Karkat up until now."  
"How old is he?"  
"John is five years old, like Karkat. Come here son." The smaller human came in. I stood up as tall as I could, but he was much taller than me.  
"He's the size of a cat."  
"I'm not a cat, I'm a troll!"  
"I know that." John picked me up under my arms. I stared at him angrily before kicking my feet as I tried getting up. I wiggle, slipping from his grip and grabbed his shirt, quickly climbing onto his shoulders and wrapping my arms around the top of his head. He laughed." What are you doing Karkat?"  
He smelled weird. "Your hair is brown."  
"Yeah."  
"Why is your hair brown?"  
"Why is your hair black?"  
"I'm not the weird giant here."  
"I'm not giant! My dad's bigger than me!"  
"My dad's bigger than your dad, so why are you so big?"  
"Humans grow different."  
I laid on top of his head because he annoyed me. "You don't get to grow anymore."  
"Get off my head silly!"  
"Never!"  
"Please?"  
"Only because of your human please." I slide down from his head and slip into his arms. He was smiling his weird dull teeth. "What?"  
"You're adorable!"  
"I'm not! You take that back!"  
"Let's be best friends!" I stared at him. "Can he stay with me? Please mister troll?"  
My dad laughed. "He's definitely different from Jane. You can keep Karkat if you promise to take care of him."  
"We're going to be best friends, I know it!" John hugged me, twirling around. "I'm going back to the house!"  
"Wait John. Here." He handed John a collar. I pulled it from his grip, putting it around my neck as best as possible.  
"I'll fix it when I get to my room." John opened the door taking me with him. There were a bunch of doors, and it was brighter. As I slow got use to the light I started opening my eyes. There was lots of green on the ground and blue in the sky, but then a troll stepped in front of us. "Oh, hi Porrim."  
"Who do you have there?" Porrim smiled. She was a bit taller than John human.  
"His name is Karkat and he's as old as me!"  
"Really?"  
"Mhmm! He's Kankri's brother!"  
"He's adorable! You look like your dropping him."  
"He's heavy."  
Porrim laughed before picking me up from his grip. She was really warm, had a green collar and had one floppy tipped horn. "There we go! I'll carry him home for you."  
"Thanks Porrim." John walked with her. We reached a building that was really big, with see through parts and white walls. John opened the door, Porrim coming in with him. There was a girl inside trying to get a troll down.  
"Kankri, you are four sweeps old! Get off the fridge!"  
"When you stop making me dress up!"  
"Just put the bow tie on!"  
"No!"  
"Please?"  
"I don't want to be a show troll!"  
"I'll give you your computer back if you wear the bow!"  
"Porrim, who are you holding?"  
"He's your brother, Karkat." Kankri hopped off the fridge, coming over in front of me really quickly. He had nubby horns like dad.  
"Hey there Karkat." His eyes drifted to my neck. "You're like me?"  
"Like you?"  
"Your collar is bright red."  
"I'm like dad!" I was really excited about the bright red color. "I like red!"  
"He really doesn't know?" Kankri looked up to Porrim a moment. "Karkat, what did dad tell you?"  
"He said I'm special like him an' my brother! He says that's why I wasn't allowed to open the door, 'cause other trolls are mean to special trolls."  
Everyone was silent. "I think it's best he doesn't know." Porrim spoke up.  
"Yeah. Welcome Karkat!"


	2. Chapter 2

John is starting kindergarten, a form of human school. "I'll be back in six hours, I promise!"  
"Why can't I go?"  
"Trolls don't go to school."  
"I can go to school!"  
"No you can't, it's against the rules!"  
"Please?"  
"I still can't, I'm sorry." John set his backpack in his chair before going to grab his lunch. I don't want to stay home and learn from Kankri. I want to go to school with John.

"Dad, my backpack is heavy!"  
"Don't worry about it John, it's alright. You're just nervous about school." I heard the crunching of gravel, then the sound of doors. Soon the squeals of children came around as the sound of John's dad leaving came to my ears. I quickly realize that I can't get out of the bag. I end up stuck in it for a long time.  
"We could trade parts of our lunch. It'll be cool Dave!" It was John.  
"All I have is ramen, coke, and Doritos." A voice stated as the bag moved. It opened quickly and I hugged John, glad I was free from the bag prison. "Is that a troll?"  
"Karkat, how long were you in there?"  
"I wanted to go to school too!"  
"Aren't trolls really expensive?"  
"I live on a troll ranch. Oh, Karkat this is Dave, Dave this is Karkat." The blonde kid with weird shades gave no hints to his reaction. The adult quickly noticed me.  
"John, why did you bring your pet to school?"  
"Karkat's my friend. He sort of snuck into my backpack."  
"Good thing trolls are hypoallergenic. I'll call your father to come get him."  
"No Miss Snowman, please let him stay! He's nice, I pinky promise!"  
"Only for today, but he hurts anyone I'm calling your dad." With that all the other kids noticed me, crowding around.  
"Wow, I've never seen a troll before!"  
"He's so tiny."  
"What's his name?"  
"Can I pet him?"  
"John human, what's going on?" I look up at John. Someone touches me and I spin around so I can see them. Someone touches my head, but before I can do anything I feel really calm.  
"Look! He's purring!"  
"He's like a cat!"  
"Alright, what are you kids up to?" Miss Snowman frowned.  
"Petting him."  
"John, can I ask how you have troll?"  
"I live on a troll ranch. Dad said that I could take care of Karkat so the other trolls won't be mean to him."  
"Why would they be mean to him?"  
"Trolls have this thing about being mean to low bloods and mutants."  
The teacher seemed interested. "He's a low blood?"  
"Yeah."  
"What color is his blood?"  
"It's red like his collar."  
"Candy red is the rarest mutation."  
"Really?"  
"Yes. That would make him the lowest blood color, correct?"  
"I think so."  
"John, do you know how trolls are ranked?"  
"No."  
"Well, in human terms he's very, very special. He's so special that I think your dad should really take him back home so you can't lose him."  
"But he didn't hurt anyone!"  
"I know, but I don't want any of the other kids trying to steal him. John, stay here, the rest of you go to lunch." The kids all left sadly except John and Dave. "Dave, what are you doing?"  
"I'm staying with my best buddy."  
"Fine. I'm calling your dad, so eat your lunch in here, alright John?"  
"Got it." John sighed. "Sorry Karkat."  
"What's wrong with my blood?"  
"I don't know."  
"I know John. Trolls are sold by blood color, high bloods being the cheapest and low bloods being really pricy. Even the cheapest sell for hundreds at pet stores, the low bloods selling for ten times that."  
"Like ten?"  
"Wrong way John."  
"Thousands?"  
"Yes. Karkat is above that, so teach doesn't want a fifth grader or something trying to steal him."  
"How do you know all of this?"  
"I learn from the best."  
"Your bro?"  
"Bro and tv. Cop shows teach a lot."  
"We aren't supposed to watch those."  
"I can, because I'm cool."  
"Woah. Karkat, you can have some of my lunch." John handed me part of his sandwich.  
"He eats normal food?"  
"Yeah, why wouldn't he?"  
"Has he eaten ramen before?"  
"No."  
"Try this." Dave pushed over a tall metal cup with soup in it. I tried getting the soup out, but the three pronged eating device couldn't get it out very well. It tasted weird.  
"What's this? It tastes weird."  
"Ramen." Dave took back the weird food. "What do you usually eat?"  
"Whatever John eats."  
"How old are you?"  
"Two sweeps old."  
"He's two months younger than me." You all talk for not long before John's dad shows up. I try hiding in one of the cubbies so he can find me.  
"Karkat, I'm talking you home."  
"Karkat isn't here, he's at home."  
"Karkat, I can see you."  
"No you can't."  
"Kankri turned the house upside down trying to find you. You had us worried."  
"Kankri's boring."  
"He's just protective." John's dad picked me up. "I'm sorry if he was an interruption." He carried me out, putting me in the car. He was calling somewhere."Kankri, you're on speaker."  
"No..." I pouted in my seat.  
"Karkat, how could you just run off like that?! You know what could have happened to you?! You could have died! Someone could have kidnapped you, or worse-" I hung up the phone. I don't like being yelled at and Kankri doesn't know when to stop talking.  
"You're making it worse you know."  
"I know how to handle Kankri."  
"You're going to hide in John's room?"  
"Yes. He'll never look there!"


	3. Chapter 3

John spends too much time at school with only a tiny amount of time for summer. I learned everything I need to know from Kankri and the internet, but something's missing. I'm just staring at the wall now I'm so bored. There's a loud thump as something hits the wall of John's room. I scramble over to the widow, peering out. It was a bunch of trolls my age playing outside. I try opening the window, but I don't know why it won't budge.  
"Kankri, how do you open the window?"  
"Hm?" Kankri looked up from the computer. "You see the little switch things?" He pointed at the window in Jane's room. "You pull them the other way and them you push the edge up off the sill to open it."  
"Thanks Kankri!" I ran back to John's room, opening the window. I climbed onto the window sill, but then realized it would be hard getting back in.  
"Hey, who are you?" A sea dweller asked.  
"I'm Karkat."  
"I'm Eridan. What are you doing?"  
"I'm climbing out the window 'cause I want to play too."  
"Then let's play!" He smiled excitedly. I hopped down to the ground. "Oh, maybe Feferi can play with us. We were playing hide and go seek, but we didn't know we would find another troll."  
"There's more trolls?"  
"Yeah! You say that like you've never left that house."  
"I haven't left it in a sweep."  
"How old are you?"  
"Three sweeps."  
"Are you from here?"  
"Yeah, I was in that born here."  
"It can't be health for a troll to be in a house that long. Oh, Feferi! I found another troll." He exclaimed to the sea dweller sitting on the pond edge with a psiioniic. You knew he had to be because of his eyes.  
"Is he new here? I've never seen him before."  
"That's the thing. He actually lives in the main house and hasn't been outside in a sweep! We can have even teams now!"  
"What's your name? I'm Feferi and this is Sollux." Feferi smiled, Sollux looking over casually.  
"I'm Karkat."  
"How do we know he'th not a thtray?" Sollux asked. "If he'th a thtray we have to make thure he doethn't get caught."  
"I'm not a stray. See?" I tugged down my turtleneck to show my grey collar, which I switched to just to mess with Kankri. "I'm John human's troll."  
"Oh, so that's why we haven't seen you! He must have picked you not long after pupation." Feferi giggled. "You should meet the others! There are eleven in our group, but it's twelve now if you want to join us."  
"Yeah!"  
"Let's go!" Feferi lead the way over a few hills to a big tree several trolls were gathered near. I was surprised to see two of them had wings, one pair maroon and the other cerulean. "Guys, we found another troll! This is Karkat and he's our age."  
"Really? I'm surprised we haven't seen him before. I'm Terezi." The troll with a teal collar stated.  
"I've heard that name before. The ghosts say your Kankri's brother." The girl with maroon wings smiled eriely.  
"Okay..." I just eye her.  
"Wow Megido, way to be creepy. She's Aradia, and I'm Vriska. The dork in the tree roots is Tavros, the one in the branches is Nepeta, sweaty creep is Equius, Kanaya is fixing Gamzee's shirt for the fourth time, and you've met them."  
"I don't see anyone in the branches." I stare a long time up in the tree foliage for a troll to find none. I spot her at the last minute as she tackles me to the ground.  
"Ahhhhh! You're supurr cute!" She hugs me tightly while giggling wildly.  
We tumble around until I manage to get free, which results in her trying to start play fighting again. It quickly turns into tag with all the others joining in. It got hard at the point where Vriska kept cheating by flying out of reach, but Aradia held out her hand, letting Tavros tag her before flying after Vriska and tagging her.  
Of course the bus was coming down the road and I could hear it. "I have to go, but I can play tomorrow."  
"Bye Karkat!" They all cheered as I ran back home. It took too long to get in the window and by the time I shut it the door opened.  
"Hey Karkat! I don't have homework today."  
"Teacher finally realized that work was pointless?"  
"No, she wasn't at school today."  
"Figures."  
"Did you have a fun day?" He was holding something behind his back.  
"What are you holding?"  
"None of your concern." He smiled goofily.  
I try grabbing it, and unlike last time it was covered up so I couldn't see it. He held it over his head, and in my attempts to grab it we both ended up falling over. I grabbed it, pulling it out of the bag. "Titanic?" I read the movie title aloud.  
"Dave said you might like it. He's coming over by the way, so please don't try to eat his bird this time."  
"I wasn't eating it. Stupid crow wouldn't stop saying 'Nak' like the brain dead vermin it is, rolling around in its own filth."  
"He has three of them now. Nakodile, Crowsprite, and Lil' Dave."  
"Pompous a-"  
"Hey, no cussing!"  
"Fine, pompous apple."  
"I seriously don't know where you're getting the cussing." A knock sounded at the door. "Hi Dave!"  
"Sup." Dave walked in with his bag and his stupid bird cage for birds. I already am staring down the stupid monsters inside.  
"Sup John." The white bird stated, sounding like Dave. It was weird, considering the other two were black. The biggest one was already starting to say nak repeatedly.  
"John, can you let Kankri join you? I'm going to Roxy's house to study and they don't allow trolls off leash."  
"He refuses to wear a leash?" Dave asks.  
"Yeah, so can you guys watch him?"  
"Only if he's willing to wear make up. I've got all sorts of stuff in my bag that would be great for his complecti-"  
"I've got the leash let's go!" Kankri raced over to the door with his leash clipped to one of his pants loops. Jane mouthed 'thank you' to Dave before heading out.  
"Can we watch movies now?"  
"Of course we can!" John stuck in a random movie.


	4. Chapter 4

Last night a snowstorm hit, blanketing the ground in twenty inches of snow. That meant no school for John or Jane. I decided to go outside and play until John woke up. When the news says twenty inches they mean it, and I fell into the deep snow as soon as I get on the windowsill, sinking in deep.  
My first year going outside in snow and I quickly learn how cold it is. "Ah! Shit it's cold!"  
"Karkat? Did you climb out the window?" John asked.  
"I wanted to play in the snow."  
"Do you want shoes? Or maybe better pants?"  
"Yes."  
John laughed. "Get in here!" I climb back in, dragging a bunch of snow with me. "Here's a dry sweater, and pants, and a jacket."  
"No shoes. They feel weird."  
"Fine but you're going to freeze your feet off." You snort as you hold back a laugh, tossing off your sweater and grabbing the dry one. John's face is starting to go red. "Can you, um, turn around, maybe?"  
"Why? We're both guys."  
"Yeah, but you, how do I explain this, um..."  
I look down at my chest. "Oh. When did that happen?" I pull on my sweater quickly. "That was odd."  
"Wait, you didn't even know?"  
"I haven't changed my sweater in two weeks."  
"Karkat, that's gross!"  
"I haven't left this house during that time. It wasn't like it was getting dirty."  
"You still have to change your clothes!"  
"I did, just not my sweater." I finish pulling on the clothes before turning around to see John tugging on a jacket. "You're going out side too?"  
"Yeah! Snow is awesome! Every year, Signless leads the snowball fights, but you stayed inside with Kankri like usual."  
"You mean I was captured by Kankri like usual. I want to join!"  
"You can meet the other trolls!"  
"I've actually been sneaking out for the past two years."  
"Oh. You can just use the door, you aren't trapped inside."  
"Kankri lectured me the one time I tried about 'the dangers of outside'. It was horrible."  
John grabbed my hand and head for the door. "No worries, I've got him covered!" Very quickly you spot Kankri making hot chocolate in the kitchen.  
"Where are you two headed?"  
"Outside! Come on Kankri, it's fun!"  
Kankri was about to say something when there was knocking on the kitchen window. We all look over to see a troll that reminded me of a glasses less Eridan. "Do you want to build a snowman?" Kankri drew the curtains and went back to making hot chocolate.  
"Come outside with us! It's really fun!" John smiled. "Plus, you can be on Signless' team for the snowball fight and give us even numbers!"  
"No. If I go outside I have to deal with more than just Cronus and Porrim at the window."  
"Your going outside." Jane tossed him a jacket. "In the name of Signless or Her Imperial Condense. Besides, without you who would give us a motivational speech and watch out for triggers?"  
"I guess you all need my assistance." Kankri put his cup of hot chocolate aside and slipped on the coat.  
I grabbed John's hand and ran out side. My feet didn't even register that it was freezing I was so excited. I could see the trolls gathered near the barn, spotting them much easier now that there was a blanket of white snow everywhere. I could see they were obviously split into two groups. I spotted my friends in the group hidden near the trees, so I ran that way.  
"Karkat!" "Karkat's here!" "Karkitty!" "Hey there Karkles."  
John laughed. "When we starting this?"  
"Is Kankri joining a side?" Summoner asked. Everyone looked over to see your brother was no where to be seen. "I guess not. Alright, we are going up against the Condense and her forces. If the rebellion fails she's taking no hostages. Where's Jane?"  
"She joined the Condense." John stated as he looked down at the ground."  
"We have lost another to the dark side."  
"Where did Signless go?" Terezi asked.  
"Unfortunately, Condense baited Darkleer into biting him, so he's at the vet right now. He should be back in a day or two. It starts whenever someone throws the first snowball, so let's make snowballs as quickly as possible and be the first ones." All the trolls and John were building as fast as possible, stacks of snowballs stacking up.  
"I call first throw!" Nepeta had an armful of snowballs. Equius kept squishing his snowballs accidentally, so he would just get snow to build up the snowballs. The fort was the few tree houses that you could only get into by ladder or flying. Vriska, Aradia, Meenah, and Rufioh were on top of the tree houses with as much snow as they could get up there.  
As it turns out, the first throw was actually by Porrim, but it was at Kankri who wasn't on either side of the snowball fight. In all honesty, it was funny to watch, but fairly quickly Nepeta threw a snowball at someone who was actually playing. In the end, everyone ended up coated in snow as the fight came to a close.  
Mr. Egbert and Kankri came out of the house with hot chocolate, passing it out. "How's the rebellion going?" Mr. Egbert laughed.  
"I died!" John laughed, "and they took Karkat hostage to find the base."  
"Where is Karkat?"  
"I'm over here!" I called from where I hung from the rafters near the barn door. I was dangling by just my ankle from a rope. Of course that was the moment the old rope failed. I sat up, hand to my head a moment. Several of the trolls were muttering in surprise. "What's wrong?" Everyone seemed really surprised. "Is something wrong? What's going on? Why are you all just staring at me like that?"  
"Your blood is candy red." Terezi stated.  
"Freak! Just like his father." Condense spat.  
"Hey, don't say that!" Feferi growled.  
"Yeah!" Meenah added," grubby mcshouts is cool!"  
"He's a freak, a reject, a mutant!" Grand High Blood belowed. "He should be culled!" Mr. Egbert quickly jumped in front of you.  
"Do you need to be chained up like a wild animal?! I just let you start roaming around again, but I guess that's too much."  
"I was just joking about the boy." GHB growled, he slowly circled, Mr. Egbert staring protectively in front of you. "No need to be irrational."  
"Then back off before you prove me rational. Now go, I don't want you stepping anywhere near Karkat ever." He came back over to me quickly, checking over me quickly. "Are you alright?"  
"What's going on?"  
"You got a scratch on your head, but you should be fine." He picked me up and started walking back home.  
"Wait, what about the snowball fight?"  
"I think you should just stay inside."  
"But I want to play with my friends!"  
"The older trolls will just bully you. I'm taking you back inside for today."  
I try wiggling out of his grip, but he has a good grip on me. I struggled all the way back home even when he put me down on the couch. "I just want to be like the other trolls. Why can't I play with them?"  
"Some things are just difficult."


	5. Chapter 5

(AN- I put spacing. Sorry if it was hard to read)  
I stare out the window, annoyed that today my friends hadn't come by. "What are you doing today John?" I asked as John tried sneaking by.

"I'm training Kanaya to be a show troll. She really wanted to to be one but Jane is busy with Porrim."

"What's a show troll?"

"It's a troll that is taken to a show ring and judged based on how close they are to the guidelines of their caste area being low, mid, or high blooded. It's sort of like beauty pageants and dog shows got mixed together."

"What is so great about being a show troll?"

"It's a high stake competition. Porrim was blue ribbon on the state level, and with Kanaya being so much like her she wanted to try."

"What's the guidelines?"

"It's looks and feeling the right temperature and such. Kankri throws fits about them because he considers them degrading and stupid."

"Does it mean that you'll be gone for a week or two like Jane is every summer."  
"Probably."

"Can I be a show troll?"

John seemed surprised to say the least. "You want to be a show troll?"

"Yes."

"You know you have a female bodytype, right? If you became a show troll you would have to wear a dress."

"Then I will rock that dress better than anyone else. It doesn't change the fact that I'm a guy."  
"You will have to put up with Jane."

"I deal with Kankri on a daily basis. Jane is no problem."

"What about Kankri? He's going to be mad."

"Good."

"It's intense. Lots of trolls, you're a mutant, snide comments, and compitition."

"Wouldn't be fair any other way."

"Ready for compitition?"

"I was born ready."

"Let's go!"

"Fuck yeah!"

Kankri sighed loudly from somewhere down the hall. "Stop cusing. It is rude-"

"Come on John." I walked with John towards the door.

"What do you think you're doing Karkat?"

"Going with John."

"He's training another poor troll to be a show troll today. He is going to be very busy, so going with him isn't a great idea when most of the older trolls don't like you."

"He's training me today to be a show troll."

"Excuse me?"

"You heard right. Go, go, go!" I hurry John out the door with me. Kankri was shouting something as I slammed the door. "He should be fine in a few hours."

"I think he will have a speech ready for you in a few hours." John looked back at the house again before leading the way.

"If he has a speech ready then I will just get peanut butter out. He loves peanut butter."

"What if that doesn't work?"

"Jane will be home by then."

"That's a good point." John looked over towards the sound of Jane shouting. I spot Porrim and Kanaya with her. Jane seemed really excited, already having spotted the two of us. "I think she sees you."

"Thanks for the deduction Sherlock, how would I have ever come to that conclusion on my own without your assistance?"

"No need to be a smart aleck."

"Is Karkat joining us today?" Jane excitedly asked.

"Yes. That's why I'm here." I didn't expect her to laugh.

"Figures that John picks a troll and you want to be a show troll, but when I pick a troll I get cranky Kankri!"

That was the best name I have ever heard for Kankri. "He's probably preparing a speech for when I get back."

"Don't worry Karkat, I think I can handle Kankri by now. Let's get started!"

I'm starting to regret my decision, but it's too late to back down. Three weeks of just posture and how to stand and stupidity like that. And no cursing. Apparently trolls aren't supposed to talk during the show thing unless a judge talks to them, much less 'swear like a sailor' as Jane explained it.

"Aren't you listening to me Karkat?" Kankri huffed," Being a show troll is degrading and imposes beauty standards based on what is considered normal."

The peanut butter ran out this morning, so I'm just hoping that the last two hours of John and Jane's school year hurry the fuck up. "I know this Kankri." Suddenly I had an idea instead of just sitting here listening like I did for the last two hours. "Don't you think I might be doing this to prove to them that even though I'm a mutant I'm just as good as they are? No candy red bloods have been seen outside this farm, so I'm obviously not going to have standards they have to follow on judging me. Just imagine how panicked they will be when they can't judge a troll on their mutation, but will instead be forced to scramble around like bees in a crushed hive in a pathetic attempt to find a way to judge me."

I look over to see Kankri just standing there dumbfounded, mouth wide open like I said something he couldn't even understand. Honestly, I'm 98% sure they will just use the maroon blood standards for my judging, but Kankri looks like he's so mind blown that he might have to sit down before he passes out.

"Kankri? Are you okay there?" He remains silent. I just walk out the door to find Porrim. It takes five minutes, but I find her with Kanaya in a patch of flowers. They are facing the other way, so I have to get much closer, and shout their names a few times to get their attention.

"Kankri finally let you out? Hey, are you okay?" Porrim switches to concern when she sees my face.

"I think I broke Kankri."

"What makes you think that?" Porrim laughs.

"He stopped talking." Porrim and Kanaya are on their feet in a moment, dragging me with them back to the house before I realized what was going on. We all got to the house quickly. Kankri was still in shock, but he wasn't standing anymore; he was now laying on the ground in the middle of the floor. "I swear he isn't dead yet."

"Yet?" Porrim looked like she was holding back a laugh," What did you tell him?"

"He lectured me for two hours about being a show troll and to get him to shut the hell up I told him that there aren't standards for candy red bloods and that the judges would basically be unable to judge me and I joined for that reason. I didn't think it would do this to him!" I motion to my brother, who was still on the ground.

"I'm not really sure what to do here. Actually, this might give us time to pick a dress out for the compitition." Porrim's eyes went my way.

"I hope you aren't talking about me." I notice Kanaya giving me the same glance. "Not today. You guys already won't let me cut my hair."

"You have three days until the compitition, one of which is going to be travel time. You've postponed this long enough."

"Fine, but can I get lunch first?"

"Kankri has been on you're case pretty hard, huh?"

"You know it." I get to the kitchen just as I hear two excited voices at the door. John and Jane came in. "You guys are home early!"

"Yeah, it's the last day of school!" John tossed his bag. "Let's go to the arcade!"  
"He needs to figure out what he's going to wear first." I could already see Jane thinking of the possibilities.

"How about we come back by six so you can give Karkat a chance to cool off before the contest? Besides, I'm sure you already have ideas you had planned since Kankri."  
"Yeah. Hey, where is he anyway?"

"Karkat knocked him out with words." Porrim motioned to the floor where Kankri had fallen asleep.

"You should make it until seven." Jane handed John some bills. "Go eat at that pizzeria Karkat really likes. I'll pick you up there."

John attempted to give me a high five, and after realizing he still hadn't dropped his hand I high fives him before heading to the door. Unfortunately, leaving the ranch meant wearing a leash, but John clipped it to one of my belt loops instead of my collar. "Let's go!"

I raced with John down the hill, but then he gave me that look. "Oh no, I am not carrying your ass down the hill, so drop the big eyes and begging glance of a barkbeast wanting table scraps. It's not going to happen."

"But Karkat," John wasn't dropping his constant gaze," it's really cool! Please? Last time I saw them was the day of the snowball fight two years ago!"

There was no convincing him otherwise at this point. "If I do, you still have to keep it a secret from Jane. And Kankri. And everyone who doesn't know."

"Karkat, I already promised I won't tell anyone without your okay first."

"It still stands."

"I know that." The smile on his face... he knows he won. I sigh, pulling my sweater up until I can actually move my stupid wings. I may be a mutated piece of shit, but every time I saw my wings it made me feel special. I wrap my arms around John's chest before taking off. He was a lot harder to carry than I remembered, but I stayed ten feet off the ground as we glided down the hill until suburbs started coming into view about twenty minutes later.

"Yeah!" I hid my wings as John looked over. "Oh, I guess you have to Karkat. Hey, we're almost there!" John excitedly lead the way.

"I haven't been to an arcade in a while."

"Yeah I know. The one we're headed to just became troll friendly."

"Hell yes!" John laughed most of the way there. The pizza place I love was literally next door. This is the best day ever. "I'm awake right now?"

"Why wouldn't you be awake?"

"I don't know. If I was asleep there would have been some sort of nightmarish thing by now, so it must be true." John looked so excited. He dragged me in, heading for the back of the arcade. I immediately notice Strider with his usual poker face leaning against the side of a dance game with a red backpack.

"Guess how many tokens I have?" Dave opened the backpack, reveling that it was filed to the brim with tokens.

"How did you even get that many?!"

"It's called being awesome. Let's start." The next few hours were spent going from dance games to some gun games to some racing thing to some platform game. "I know the best game to end this off with before pizza."

"What would that be?" I ask. Dave motioned to the dance game.

"If you beat me I will take off my shades."

"Deal!" I hop up, waiting as Dave selected a song. "Did you just pick expert for Butterfly Samurai? Really?"

"Don't judge."

"Be ready to remove those shades Strider, because you are going down!"

There are a few things that happened. First, Dave knows the expert level dance moves for the song by heart, and that includes the arm movements and such. Second, I only could manage about half of it before I started just mirroring Dave. Third, I lost. Fourth, John laughed his ass off watching us dance.

Thank you pizza for existing, because dancing to Butterfly Samurai four times in a row is exhausting.


	6. Chapter 6

(AN- realize the lack of spacing in 4 & 5 was an error. Fixed it, but if any of it's still hard to read feel free to message me and I will fix it ASAP.)  
I had completely forgotten that when I got home I would have to deal with Jane. As soon as she parked she dragged me inside to her room. Unfortunately, Dave was staying over, so he decided to follow me. "Why is Jane dragging you into a room full of dresses and shit?"  
"I'm taking Karkat with me to the troll show." John answered while I glared at Dave. "He has a female body type, so he has to wear a dress."  
"They all seem really girly."  
"And yet I'm still manlier than you Strider! And I look fucking fantastic, unlike a certain ironic douchebag." I growl before Jane tosses me a dress.  
"I can rock a dress better than you. I don't even need the boobs."  
"Bring it on!"  
For the next three hours, it's just me and Dave wearing different dresses until Jane, Porrim, and Kanaya agree which one is best for me and the one they like best on Dave. It basically turned into a contest of who was more fabulous. It got out of hand quickly, and next thing I know Dave and I have complete outfits, make-up and all.  
"I admit, you do look good in a dress, but I still look five times more amazing. Can barely hold a candle to this Vantas."  
"Some say Vanta-" my brother stopped mid sentence, turning around and walking away again.  
"Wait Kankri, I have a question."  
"What is it Karkat?"  
"Who looks better, me or Dave?"  
Kankri sighed. "I'm not sure how to answer your question. Do you mean based on outfits? Appearance? There isn't really a way for me to truly determine which is better."  
"Come on Dave. There has to be someone around here."  
"It's ten thirty at night."  
"You forget that trolls are nocturnal. Plus, Cronus always stays near the back door."  
"Why?"  
"I don't know. He caught a burgled once because of it." I walked down the hall to the back door in my stupid heels with Dave following. I opened the door to find Cronus had been leaning on it, falling in. "You alright Cronus?"  
"Yeah. How you doing chief?" Cronus sat up, candy cigarette in his mouth.  
"Can you tell us which of us look better?"  
Cronus looked like he was being faced with a difficult question. He spent what felt like eternity thinking about it, circling us once or twice as if it would make it any easier. "I'm going to say mister shades by just a little bit-"  
"I win." Dave stated. "Take that Vantas."  
"I didn't even finish." Cronus frowns. "Sorry, but I was saying mister shades by just a little bit loses."  
How Dave kept his poker face I will never know. I just some words for him. "Suck it Strider." I left Dave, walking back into the house. I'm surprised Strider can keep up so well in heels when it took me a week to figure out how to walk in them without breaking my neck. What is the point of heels anyway, to make you taller? Can't there be really formal flats? Scratch that, walking on flats would probably suck too.

John was half way through Con Air. "Can we watch something cool? Anything is cooler than this."

He turned around. "What do you suggest? No romcoms."

"You just excluded a huge section of great cinema."

"You're both wrong." Dave came in, switching the DVD. "This is what we want to watch."

We all sat in silence through the preview stupidity that always is jammed in before movies. It felt like forever before the actual movie started. I gaze Dave a questioning glance. "Really? Snow White? _Disney _Snow White?"

"I'm not questioning you for looking like her."

"My dress is shorter, different colors, no crazy color thing, and puffier sleeves."

Dave stared at me with his usual poker face. "Red top, white bottom I'll admit are different along with the dress' collar thing. Going to mid calf isn't much shorter, and seriously the sleeves look the same with the color reversed. You are troll Snow White or some shit."

"No, that is not a thing."

"It is now."

"You can't just put 'troll' in front of something and it magically is a thing."

"Yes I can, it happens all the time. You are a troll Disney princess."

"And you look like the sleeping princess but with shades."

"Damn I'm hot."

"No your not."

"Yes I am."

"Dave doesn't look like Princess Aurora."

"I'm making a point her John, and yes he looks like her from when she was living in the forest with the fairies."

"Actually, he kind of does. You both look like princesses." John smiled like he was trying not to laugh. It was then that me and Dave came to an agreement. We both grabbed John and dragged him into his room. It took twenty minutes, but John put on, or was rather forced into, Jane's dress from the dance last year, which looked like Cinderella's dress and left a trail of glitter everywhere. I held him still while Dave did his hair and makeup, Dave holding him still while I put his socks and shoes on. We both stepped back, looking over our work.

"Not bad Strider."

"Trolls are stronger than I thought. Think he can reach his feet?"

"Not in that dress."

"You guys are evil."

"Shut it John, can't you see us working on our evil plan here? World domination is harder than it looks you know."

"Can I get out of this dress?"

"Not until we watch Cinderella." Dave Pulled John to his feet, but he fell back into his bed quickly. Dave carried him bridal style back to the couch before dropping him into the middle seat, plopping down unceremoniously next to him. After watching Snow White, we watched Sleeping Beauty much to John's protest. Unfortunately for John, none of us stayed awake much longer past the point Sleeping Beauty, and Dave, fell asleep.

I wake up to the sound of a click, quickly realizing it was Jane with a camera. Before I could say anything she rubbed my horns, then took another picture. She dragged me to her room while still rubbing my horns, stopping when she closed the door.

I snapped out of my sleepy trance. "What's the big idea? You of all people should know not to grab a troll's horns!"

"Shh. I just wanted to get a picture of my brother in a dress. If you woke them up I wouldn't be able to upload them, now would I?"

"Is this because of the pranking war?"

"All is fair in love and war."

"Is this because he put bleach in your shampoo?"

"He's the one who did that?"

"No. It was some other guy."

"Oh, this was going to be for those pictures from my sleepover, but now he's in for it."

"Those pictures were because you told Kankri he had a project on social justice. The bleach was for the cupcakes with laxatives in them."

"Okay, I'll admit both were going a bit overboard, but I still need to level things out."

"You sucked Kankri on him. Where is he by the way?"

"Cronus kept knocking on the window, so he went to John's room."

"There's your revenge, now can you two stop? I'm not too excited with getting stuck in the attic again."

"By the way, how come I didn't know you have wings?"

"Reasons!"

"Is that why you always went to dad for help?"

"Yes, now drop it."

"You know that effects your judging too, right?"

"No, I didn't know that."

"Now you do. Can you get Kankri for me?"

"Fine." I sneak down the hall, getting to John's room quickly. I spot Kankri staring out the window almost calmly. "You're awake?"

"Yes and I have a question."

"What?"

"Why didn't you tell me about your other mutation? Stop me if I say something triggering, but shouldn't you be open about your mutation? It's not healthy to repress your feelings like thi..."

I could only sit there and listen.


	7. Chapter 7

"Come on! Were running late!" John kept dragging me along behind him.  
"No we're not, now slow down before I trip!"  
"Oh, sorry Karkat. I keep forgetting your heels." John slowed down, noticing the other competitors in the registration line. It felt like forever, John's cousin Jade smiling when she walked past with Kanaya after registering, before it was your turn.  
"Hello there, what troll are you registering?" The woman at the desk twirled her pen with a smile on her face.  
"My troll. His name is Karkat."  
"Cute name! How old is he?"  
"Six sweeps, fourteen years."  
"Okay. Karkat, give me your hand." I slowly held out my hand. The woman grabbed it, pricking my finger quickly. I pulled back automatically, red dripping on the desktop and definitely a bit on the paper she had put down on the desk before pricking my finger. "Karkat sweetie... I've never seen this blood color before with trolls."  
"What's going o- is that the troll's blood?" Another one of the registration people stopped mid walk, looking over to me. I held up my hand to show that was indeed my blood. "That's unbelievable. Any other mutations?" The words were to John.  
"He has wings, but other than that no."  
"Incredible. Follow me." The guy picked up the papers, heading off with John and I following closely behind down the hall. John just exchanged glances with me, neither of us knowing what to do. When we entered a room with the person there were, you guessed it, more people. He said some things, then everyone just seemed to stare at me in surprise.  
"We aren't really sure what to do with you. You automatically win the blood color level judging because you are the only candy red blood ever seen. Do you want to continue? People are going to be snide."  
"Yeah."  
"The next judging is in fifty minutes, so you can wander if you want. Oh, here is your blood color identifier," the guy tied a bright red ribbon around my neck along with handing me a prize ribbon," and you are free to go."  
John and I walked out, not really sure what to do. "Do you want to watch your sister compete? Or is it Jade first?"  
"I think we should watch Jane. Jade is nervous as it is." John lead the way, Dave coming into view. "Dave! We won by default! We're going to the next round!"  
"You serious bro?"  
"Yeah!" John held up my hand and the ribbon I was holding. "He got his own blood division."  
"That's impossible." A big buff looking guy commented. A troll was standing next to him with a maroon neck ribbon. He was glaring at me before talking, or rather gruffly arguing with John and Dave.  
"Why hello there." I almost jumped when the I heard the maroon troll girl's voice softly in my ear, pulling my attention from my best buddies.  
"Hello there."  
"So you're the candy blood everyone is talking about?"  
"Unless there is another mutant, yes."  
"Clever are we?"  
"Can you stop touching me please? It's a little creepy."  
"Oh, so I can't get a little friendly with the compitition?"  
"Friendly doesn't mean constantly touching me."  
"You know, lots of trolls are going to be after you." She seemed to be singing.  
"You say that like it's a good thing."  
"Hmm... Do you know any winning trolls?"  
"Yes."  
"Ask them how trolls and their owners act around prize winning trolls. But prize or not, a candy red blood? Some owners might start asking yours if you can be with theirs."  
"Wait, you mean like hanging out or like mating?"  
"Obviously the second one. I understand you're six, but you're really naive. They really should limit the competition to those already having heat cycles. Do I need to explain that too?"  
"No, I was explained that."  
"Am I making you uncomfortable?"  
"Stop saying things like that. It sounds all weird."  
"Sorry, I usually talk like this. Drives trolls wild if you know what I mean."  
"Lovely." I froze as she rubbed her head against my shoulder. "Can you stop that, please?"  
"Alright, cut it out." The big gruff guy pulled her away. "Sorry 'bout that, she's in heat right now. Your troll seems fine though."  
"You alright there Karkat?" John asked, waving bye to the guy he had been talking to.  
"That was awkward."  
"She really seemed to like you."  
"She also was really interested whether I'm old enough to have heat cycles."  
"Those should be starting up any time for you actually."  
"What?"  
"Well, their fourteenth birthday was around the time both Kankri and Signless started from what I know, so you start a bit earlier than a maroon blooded troll."  
"You couldn't have warned me?"  
"Hey guys! We won blood level compitition." Jane walked over with Porrim. "What happened with you guys?  
"Karkat won by default for his blood division!" John held the ribbon up.  
"That's great! How you doing Karkat? Excited?"  
"A maroon troll tried romancing him, so he's a little unhappy."  
"She kept rubbing herself on me."  
"She must have started early then." Porrim stated, "Heat cycles are usually the last week of the month."  
"I know. Seven weeks a year without Kankri is hard to miss."  
"He hides in the closet." Jane stated.  
"So that's what he does!" Porrim smirked.  
"Wait, do these things correlate with heat cycles?"  
"Yeah. Trolls are calmer and more affectionate during heat cycles... Unless of course they run into a pitch love. In that case they're extremely aggressive. December is mating season, so cycles start a week earlier and last till the start of January. It hits Kankri pretty hard. For one or two weeks he doesn't yell or even talk, he just follows me around my room purring and trying to cuddle up to me. It's sort of weird."  
"That's actually really funny."  
"It won't be when you start having to deal with it." Porrim shot me a glance.  
I walk away. "Karkat! You can't just walk off!" John grabbed my wrist. "How about we just look around? We do have a while before the next round."

"Fine. This is stupid."

"I thought you wanted to come."

"I did, but this is a lot of trolls and humans."

"Yeah." John and I just wandered for a while.


	8. Chapter 8

(Sorry for not posting. Been working on cosplay, so I'm sorry if I don't update often.)

This is stupid. Who would ever want to be forced into frilly clothes, have to deal with someone fussing over your looks, and be paraded around like some emotionless doll? "Karkat! Your hair is messy!" John immediately set to brushing my hair.  
"Can I take of my shoes?"  
"No, we're up next! What would the judges say?"  
"Probably 'hey, that troll doesn't have shoes on!' or something."  
"We're late, come on!" He started dragging me behind him.  
"Slow down a bit! Heels aren't exactly great for running, and we can walk there without being late."  
"Sorry Karkat. I just really want to nail the low blood competition." We both skid to a stop, almost running into the big guy from earlier with his maroon troll. "Sorry." John then try's stepping around him only for the guy to step back in our way. "We need to get to the next competition, so can we please get around you?"

"Your going the wrong way kid. I can show you the correct way if you want."

"That would be great."

"Come on, this way." I was not happy to be stuck next to this crazy troll again. She kept rubbing her head on me and trying to wrap her arms around me. At one point she thought it a great idea to grab my ass. I couldn't do a thing about her behavior, so I just pushed her away every time she tried touching me. Just when I thought she had stopped, she covers my mouth and pulls me to the side. I notice a glance from her owner before he smirks and continues.

She quickly pulls me into a store closet, pushing me back roughly into the shelf. "What the fuck is wrong with you?!"

"Excuse me candy girl!"

"I'm a boy."

"Oh, sorry about that! I really should have asked. Anyway, what was with the cussing? I just want to have some fun with you."

"Being shoved into a shelf isn't fun!"

"I slipped. You know what a pain heels are."

"Look, I really don't care about having fun with you. I'm here to compete, then when it's over spend summer with my best friend for ever."

"Your not talking about your human, are you?"

"Yes, I'm talking about John human. Jane and Dave human are cool too, but John human is still my closest human friend so far."

"Oh, how sweet. Unfortunately, I need you to stay right here."

"I need to go compete, so fuck off." I try getting around her, but she pushes me back. She hops on top off me, slowly leans down, and sniffs me. I manage to get a leg under her and kick her off with my heel. Unfortunately, or rather fortunately, I kicked her so hard my heel got caught in her dress. She grabbed my tail, yanking it hard and sending me to the floor. I lost my other heel bring my other foot down on her head. Moments later I was out of there and bolting down the hall.

I didn't want her to find me again, so being the genius I am I hid under a table. This was getting out of hand quickly, I didn't know where John is or if the big guy was hurting him, and I had a troll in heat after me. I heard the sound of paws padding along the ground and pulled back, only to remember all show trolls would keep their shoes on.

The table cloth lifts and one of the Jade bloods that worked with security looked under it. "Hey, are you alright? What's wrong?"

"It's nothing."

"Are you lost?"

"Yeah."

"Your Karkat, right? Your human is looking everywhere for you."

"Is he okay?"

"He's fine. He said he turned around and you were gone."

"A troll pulled me into a store closet."

"What?" The troll crouched down, kneeling so she could look under the table easier. "Can you explain? Which troll?"

"It was a maroon troll with horns that curled back behind her head and wearing a short pink dress with a big maroon ribbon. She dragged me into the closet, shoved me into the shelf and when I tried leaving she pinned me to the ground and sniffed me. I kicked her off and one of my heels ripped her dress and got caught, the other came off when I kicked her again for good measure. I ran off, realized I was lost, then hid here."

"Did you catch all of that?" The troll asked what was probably a human security personnel. "I know this is probably been rough, but you need to come out from under there. My partner and I will make sure you safely reach your companion."

I do get out from under the table, and the troll immediately walks with me. I follow her lead, looking back to notice the human security officer following right behind me. It doesn't take long before we end up at the same hall the big guy had lead John and I away from, heading a little further before I spot John, Jane, Dave, Porrim, Kanaya, and Jade standing together.

"Karkat!" John races forward, hugging me tightly. "Where did you go?"

"The troll with the big guy dragged me off."

"What? I was wondering where his troll went. Do you want to go home or keep competing? It's up to you, but if you want to keep competing we need to hurry. If you want to go home I'll call my dad to come get us."

"I should be fine, even if I lost the stupid shoes."

"You sure?"

"Why would I say yes if I wasn't serious? Come on!"


	9. Chapter 9

I made it in the competition to the next round. Jane took us to a restaurant that allowed trolls for celebratory dinner before we went to Jade's.  
Jade's house was a farm on the edge of town where she lived with her dog and grandfather. I hate that stupid dog instantly. "Karkat, stop growling at Bec." John laughed.  
"Bec, no! Get over here right now!" Jade tried grabbing Bec's collar, but the dog ran forward and tried to bite me. I wrestled with the dog for a bit, and just when I think it's doing well Jade and John split us up.  
"Karkat!"  
"The dog was begging for it!"  
"You're supposed to be the mature one!"  
"He. Asked. For. It."  
"I have two dog crates you know." Jade frowned as she dragged Bec off.  
"No."  
"Then don't antagonize Bec." Jade shouted back as she rounded the corner.  
"You want to watch a movie?" John smiled.

Nothing bugs me like thinking what could have happened earlier today. I have to back tomorrow, but what if that guy gets in with his troll again? My eyes immediately fall on the window as I hear frogs outside. Maybe John won't notice if I'm gone just a bit.  
The ground meets my feet quickly before I start wandering around outside. Something about night was just a lot more comforting, which is great right now. Not long before I just walk along the property as I follow a little brook.  
I found a frog, which by the looks of it was one of Jade's special frogs. I tried catching the little guy, but the stupid frog is always one leap ahead of me. When I do catch him, I realize the house is barely in sight. The rain thought now would be great to demonstrate why not to go playing at night instead of sleeping.  
By the time I got back it was still raining, the doors were locked, and the window I used was on the second story because fuck me that's why. A look around and I found Bec's doghouse. Since I was lacking much choice, I spent the night sleeping in there still holding the stupid frog.

Something is licking me and it sure as hell isn't the frog. My eyes snap open, but as soon as I move I hear a whining along with getting a paw on my arm. I stop moving and the dog continues licking away.  
"Karkat, did you spend the night outside?" Jade laughed.  
"Fuck you Harley."  
"Bec really seems to like you!"  
"I don't like him. Can you call off the barkfiend?"  
"Bec! Here Bec!" Moments later the dog got off of me. I crawled out, grabbing the frog a moment later before he hopped away. "Hey, is that a frog?"  
"Yes."  
Jade came over, crouching down to look at it. "Cool. Hey, don't you have to come inside?" She tried brushing something off my head, but for some reason I purred. We both froze. "You alright there Karkat?"  
"Yeah. That was weird." She just grinned, a look I knew all to well from John and Jane. "Hell no. Don't you da-" I didn't finish before she started petting my head again. Next thing I knew I was rubbing my head on her. I pulled away quickly. "Stop it."  
"You're like a cat!" Jade looked like she was going to laugh.  
"Oh ha ha, a troll started purring. It's so hilarious that I might not be able to stand another moment of this before I die from laughter."  
"You want to go inside or should I leave you here?"  
"Let me inside."  
"Fine." Jade lead the way back inside. As soon as I got inside I ran up to the room I was supposed to have been in and crawled under the bed. No one will find me now, so time to finally get some decent sleep.  
"Karkat?" John called," Where are you?" I just want to sleep! John can wait. He found me fairly quickly, lifting the covers and looking under the bed. "Why are you under the bed?"  
"Because it seemed like such a great idea that I thought 'maybe I should go under the bed'."  
"Come on, you need to go take a shower."  
"I just want to sleep in a bit more."  
"Karkat, shower. You look like you were playing in mud."  
"Can't a guy get some sleep?"  
"You can take a nap in the car when we leave, but you need to start the day already." He started crawling under the bed and I backed up. "Karkat, stop moving away!"  
"You need some help?" Jane asked.  
"Yes, that would be great."  
A few footsteps later, Jane crouches down and looks under. "Karkat, we need to start getting ready. Can you get out from under the bed?"  
"No."  
Jane looked done with the situation and moments later started using a broom to try to get me out. It worked, but I don't like that thing. John pulled me out the rest of the way. "Karkat... Are you purring?"  
"No." It was hard to talk and purr at the same time, but the purring wouldn't fucking stop no matter what I tried.  
Jane was immediately feeling my temperature, and I had to stop myself when I started pressing my head into her hand. Porrim showed up moments later. "I'm making pancake- Karkat?"  
"I think he's in heat."  
"No, he is in heat."  
"Is that why you don't want to go?" Jane questioned.  
"I'm tired. Can I just go to sleep?"  
"Not unless you want to miss the competition."  
"I don't think I can show up like this."  
"You can. It's normal actually."  
"What if that troll shows up again?"  
"John will be right next to you the whole time along with Dave. If one loses track of you the other will still be watching."  
"Fine, I'll go."  
"Then get moving, we need to go."


	10. Chapter 10

It was really easy to be in control of myself when I was at home, but now that there are trolls everywhere it seems ten times harder. Every time a troll walks past I just want to go up to them for some idiotic reason. Since it was hard to stay focused, John and Dave take turns keeping an iron grip on my hand.  
"Hey, at least he won't even notice how awkward the next round is." Dave commented as he helped lead me off from where the first round of today was.  
"I hope so."  
"Look at him though. He's a ball of happy right now... and he gave me the bird. Someone is cranky."  
"Fu- I mean you should politely close your mouth and leave as quickly as your flawed human legs can carry you."  
"What the hell?"  
"It's seen as impolite for a troll to cuss. You have to be miss manners around here as well."  
"Damn. That's rough."  
"Yeah. Oh, we should probably get lunch really quick."  
"Can we get away from all these trolls?" I huff.  
"Fine. There's a cafe about a block away that allows trolls on the patio. I looked it up."  
"Great. Can we get out of here now?!"  
"I don't know, can we?"  
I glare at him before walking with John. As soon as we are passed the crowd and are out of the building, I turn to Dave. "Fuck you."  
"Gasp, I never thought you could says such horrible things." He spotted something. "Hey, you said it was the big guy's troll right? Shortish, maroon blood, dressed up in a nice red party dress and ribbons."  
"Yeah wh-" I spotted the guy and the troll girl down the street talking with someone. It was another guy in a lime green suit. "Oh no."  
"Maybe we can take a short cut to the cafe? Down this street, back alley, then bam- we're there."  
"Are alleys a good idea?" John questioned.  
"I take back ways all the time and I'm fine."  
"What about that time I had to help you because you got handcuffed to a dumpster on trash day?"  
"I thought I was an escape artist. Turns out I couldn't have been more wrong."  
"Where did you even get handcuffs?"  
"Bro was a cop, remember?"  
"Oh yeah. Wasn't he gone a lot?"  
"He just had a lot of business trips. That lasted a few weeks each. Often. Actually, I'm not sure he was a cop. Maybe he was a spy or something, but I know it was like a cop."  
"Wow."  
"So which way are we going?"  
"This way." Dave lead the way across the street, then down the alley way behind the strip of buildings. There were stray cats, a bum, dumpsters, and a big van that blocked most of the back alley way. "Who paints a billiards table on a van?"  
"The guy who owns that van." John stated.  
"Thank you Captain Obvious."  
"Captain Obvious is a hero to Mister Oblivious."  
"I don't see any Mister Oblivious', so I think you can take a break from hero work, maybe wash your super suit while you have a chance."  
"Wow Dave. Hey, aren't you nervous about walking around a van in a back alleyway?"  
"It's probably a shop owner's car."  
"Are you sure?"  
"Yes." We walked around the van without any problems. "See?"  
"Oh."  
"Scaredy cat Egbert. Vans aren't evil, they're just big cars. It wasn't even on."  
"I feel really stupid."  
"Well Mister Oblivious, Captain Obvious is here to save you from your own obliviousness."  
"Your Captain Obvious? I never would have guessed."  
"You know it."  
"If I didn't know any better, I would say your identity has been revealed!"  
"Right?" He stopped laughing immediately. "John, stop."  
"What?"  
"We have to go back."  
"Why?"  
"The van ahead of us." He motioned to a big white van ahead of us.  
"It's just a van Dave."  
"Have you never heard 'Never trust a man in a big white van'? This thing screams bad news. For fucks sake the license plate even spells out pedophile."  
"It says Ped zero Fil."  
"It's idling, in the back alley, with candy on the ground behind it, and no hint the driver got out or where the driver is. This screams 'don't go passed me'."  
"Who just leaves candy on the ground?"  
"You seriously don't know anything about this?"  
"I know not to get into stranger's cars."  
"I keep forgetting you grew up in the middle of no where. Listen, this doesn't look safe, so let's go the other way, alright?"  
"Fine."  
"What are you three doing near my van?" A deep voice sounded directly behind us. We spun on our heels to see a mountain of a man in a green felt suit.  
"Uh, walking the other way?"  
The guy looked at the candy on the ground. "You guys didn't steal any candy out the back, did ya'?"  
"No. Why is there candy in your car?"  
"I deliver candy to shops."  
"Your car looks like a pedo's car."  
"Surprisingly, less kids steal candy out of my car that way."  
"I'm not surprised."  
"You kids shouldn't be talking to strangers, or even headed down this way. It's dangerous."

"John," Jane asked," Where did you get all that candy?" She looked around at the three of us eating various candies from John's backpack.  
"The nice man in a big white van gave us a whole bunch of candy." Jane smacked him. "Hey, what was that for?"  
"You trusted a guy who could have been a pedophile!"  
"That's what I said." Dave stated.  
"Your logic must have done wonders."  
"It takes a while to get things through John's head."  
"You could have gotten kidnapped."  
"But we didn't." John noted.  
"You can't just depend on people being nice. They pretend to be nice, they act like your friend, then they take advantage of you while you're off guard. Don't just trust people."  
"Okay... Want some candy?"  
Jane looked ticked, grabbing the first candy off the top before walking off. "She's pissed."  
"I'm lost here."  
"Of course you are Karkat."


	11. Chapter 11

I'm not sure what I was expecting when I had to put on a bikini. Not sure at all. It turns out it was so the judges could look trolls over to see what they looked like to help compare them to the other trolls. I was glad that was over and I was back in the stupid dress I was wearing. Of course, the judges had an issue with me.  
"I'm not sure we can allow him through."  
"Does he not meet standards?"  
"He matches them perfectly, like a dictionary, except the blood color-"  
"I know about his blood color. It makes judging difficult, but look at him. If it weren't for his off blood color he would be the perfect definition of a show troll. Shape off his face, symmetry, tail length, height, fur coloration, wing coloration, bright eyes, no scars, no signs of any deformities or past injuries, great teeth."  
"He has nubby horns."  
"There isn't an standards for horns besides sensitivity and that they aren't cracked or broken. I think he fits the standard closest to its definition."  
"Alright."  
"You guys know the microphones are on right?"  
"Really? Who turned them o-" The sound cut out. I could see the judges arguing onstage with some of the people how worked the electronics, but everyone basically got the idea of their supposed-to-be-unheard conversation even before they turned the mica back on to announce the winners.  
"Best in show goes to Karkat Vantas, the candy red blood."  
I was still surprised they still picked me. John hugged me right there he was so happy. I'm still stunned speechless as I'm getting the ribbon, as I see Kanaya give me a smile and clapping, Jade jumping in excitement and a small smile on Dave's face. I'm not sure if I should be happy I won, or surprised I actually did it.  
"Jane! Jane! Jane!" John was shouting excitedly as he ran over to her, dragging me along with him as he went. "Karkat got best in show!"  
I never expected so many people to suddenly take interest in me. One moment everyone is minding their own business, fussing over their trolls, the next it's all eyes towards the excited kid with the prize troll. "That's great!"  
"Kanaya was runner up." Jade smiled. "How about we head out? People are getting a little crazy over the fact Karkat won."  
"Yeah. I call shot gun." Dave took off for the parking lot.  
"No, I do!" I race after him. Being a troll, I was faster. I passed him when he got outside and was at the car several moments before him. Jane unlocked the car a few seconds before Dave reached the car, leaving me no time when the door shut as Dave reached for the handle. I slammed the door lock back down.  
"No fair."  
"You got a head start."  
"You have ridiculous troll legs."  
"That's loser talk."  
"Your both pretty, now get in the back Dave." Jade pushed Dave into the back, quicky followed by Kanaya hopping in. We all got in the car, then Jane drove it down the road.  
"Since Karkat won best in show, I think you get to pick where I'm taking you guys to dinner."  
"I pick..."

"I'm still amazed." Jane mumbled, sitting down at a table with her book.  
"Let's see what they have." Dave was about to head off when I grabbed his shirt collar.  
"We have to buy tokens first."  
"Oh yeah." Dave put a bill in, getting a big cup of tokens. I got tokens, John taking some of them before following us through. That's when we spotted a DDR machine in the back. We immediately went over and checked the song list. "It's has Butterfly."  
"What about winning one of the arcade prizes?"  
"John, this machine is special."  
"See you both in two hours." John walked off. I nodded to Dave and he nodded back. He stomped his foot down, selecting the song as I hopped onto the platform. We both stomped away as the arrows went past on the screen. As soon as I saw my score I stuck another coin in and selected Butterfly again.  
I'm not sure how long we were dancing for exactly. After seven times I commented how Dave was winning because he didn't have to dance in a puffy dress, to which he left the building and came back in a few moments later in the extra dress Jane had in the car that was a very puffy bright red party dress. I compared it to my just as fluffy gray dress and decided we were equal before putting in another token.  
Now in a more difficult dancing condition, Dave couldn't react as fast and I won by just a bit. It was then on to see who could win. It was back and forth in who won, and by the time we had drained half our tokens we started getting bored off competing. John had come by around that time to show us the giant yellow salamander plushie he had won that was a bit bigger then Jade's dog Bec. He brought over our pizza slices and drinks as well in exchange for a few of our tokens, which we accepted so no one could take our spots on the machine.  
We started slowly adding dance moves in with our dancing, so by the time only a quarter of our original tokens were left we started looking like experts. We kept dancing until the tokens ran out much to our disappointment. And as we quickly realized, our tokens ran out to the disappointment of the arcade goer crowd that had gathered around to watch us.  
Dave and I had to leave the machine. "I left my wallet in my pants."  
"So we have to ask Jane for the keys without her saying time to go?"  
"Pretty much." We both walk over to the table Jane was supposed to be at, only to find it totally clean. "Oh shit." Dave ran out the door with me on his heels. We got outside, immediately noticing that Jane's car was gone.  
"Fuck."  
"You said it Vantas."  
"What do we do now?"  
"No clue. Probably start walking to Jade's house."  
"Isn't that just fantastic?"  
"Alright Little Mister Sunshine, let's get going." Dave stated before leading the way down the street. It was boring and several times we had no clue where we were going. In fact, right now we had no clue where we were going.  
Things are not going well, and just to make things worse a van stopped near us before the back doors opened. Two burly guys hopped out and grabbed us without warning then dragged us into the van. "Let go!" Dave growled, struggling in their grip. I chomped down on my attacker's arm, making him him hiss in pain.  
"Stop biting or the girl gets it."  
"I'm a boy." Dave frowns.  
"What? Er, fine! Stop biting or this kid gets it." The guy holding Dave captive held up a nightstick, glaring at me as he raised it up. I quickly let go of the guy's arm, immediately getting Dave and I thrown into a wooden crate. The lid was on quickly.

"Dave, any ideas what to do?" I whispered.

"No." He frowned.


	12. Chapter 12

I don't know what's going on outside of the crate, but it must be one hell of a bumpy ride. Dave has one foot to the side to keep from getting tossed around, and I quickly mimic this only because it seems to work. "Someone learned to drive at asshole school, home of the assholes. I'm pretty sure he cut someone off."  
"I think their past the point of being assholes Dave."  
"Probably." The crate got tossed around again. "Can he drive straight for five minutes? I'll even take two minutes at this point, just as long as he stops making horrible turns."  
"That's not going to happen." To my surprise, the van's driving smoothed out to the point we could barely feel him making turns.  
"The universe just loves proving you wrong."  
"Tell me about it."  
"Well, ever time you say something is goi-"  
"Stop." I sigh," I know already. I'm tired and go home right now." Dave put a hand on my shoulder, slowly leaning me over. I ended up half curled up on his lap with him running his hand through my hair. It would have been great, except once again my stupid self started purring for what felt like the millionth time. "Fan-fucking-tactic."  
"What's wrong with this Karkat?"  
"Stop with the hair stroking. It's making me sound like a one of the human meowbeasts."  
"It makes you even more adorable."  
"I'm not adorable, I'm a blood-thirst ass-kicking warrior or some shit."  
"I can't take you seriously when you're being cute."  
"Fuck you."  
"Nah, I'm good."  
The crate started shaking, like when I rode in the car with John down dirt roads. It felt like forever before it stopped. The van was turned off, the sounds of the doors opening, and then the crate we were in started getting pulled out. It shook and dropped a bit before being carried and dropped unceremoniously unto something. The creaking of wheels noisily sounded from just below us.  
After what felt like hours, the lid was pulled off. Before Dave or I could react, we were grabbed from behind by the men from earlier and pulled out of the crate. We were in a room that looked like a nice office; shelves to the sides, a few pictures of trolls and various exotic pets, a huge dark wooden desk, and in a comfortable looking chair was a woman. The lady's long, slightly curly black hair ran down to the floor, her legs crossed and up on the desk, a heel hanging off the end further from her. Black tights disappeared into a dress that looked like a formal black coat, speckled in lime green.  
"We found a red blood." The guy holding me stated. "Best in show. One judge was nuts over it being a candy red blood."  
"Candy red? The color doesn't exist in trolls." The woman took another drag from her strangely long cigarette thing before standing up. She walked up to me, looking me over quickly before nodding to the guys behind me. Next thing I knew I was dropped on the floor in front of this woman. She tilted my head up to look at her, then tilted my head to the side. She breathed out a puff of smoke before taking notice of Dave. "Why did you catch this kid?"  
"We couldn't just let some kid see us and leave him."  
"What happened to trying to get the troll alone first?"  
"We did, but this one had an close attachment to this kid and another kid with dark hair. He was always with at least one person, so we had to take a risk. Besides, he doesn't listen unless we hold the kid hostage. It took a chunk outta Quarter's arm before we threatened to hurt the kid, then it got calm."  
"In that case," Snowman flicked her eyes over to Dave," keep him under lock key as well. You all know what to do, so get to it."  
"Yes Snowman." Several men sounded. Dave and I were quickly dragged down the hall and through a set of double doors. We quickly noticed all the different pets and trolls in the kennel-like sections of hallway. Fairly soon Dave and I were dragged into one of the sections, tossed into to different stalls at the very end of the hall.  
As soon as they slid a grate shut at the end of the hall I started pounding on the divider between me and Dave. "Dave, are you okay?"  
"Yeah, I'm in rainbow land with puppies and ducklings." He was sitting in annoyance, glaring at the door to the stall. I picked at the door, but I couldn't seem to reach the lock. "I think the people with a kennel full of trolls know how to make the place troll proof."  
"I'm trying anyway. What the hell do they even want?"  
"Seeing as how the woman has a kennel and went after a prize winning troll, probably the underground pet market. Troll wrigglers are big in the market because they are illegal to sell before two sweeps old, especially low blood wrigglers."  
"Are you serious?"  
"Maybe. I don't know, maybe the cop I learned this from was just trying to mess with me."  
"What, your Bro?"  
"No, his boyfriend who is currently a cop."  
"Can't you lie to me or something? I'm six sweeps old for fucks sakes, I do not need to hear I was captured so I can have a bunch of wrigglers."  
"Not just wrigglers, wrigglers of pedigree."  
"I'm not listening to you!" I covered my ears turning away from Dave. I could hear him trying to say something. He must have given up on that though because I felt a hand on my shoulder. I spun around to see him with his fingers reaching through the chain link that stood between each stall.  
"Sorry, I went too far."  
"This entire fucking day went to far. It went from amazing to not cool then down not okay street, over the fuck no bridge to shouldn't ever happen island."  
"When did it stop being awesome?"  
"When we found out Jane left us at the arcade."  
"Yeah, but compared to now I prefer having to walk home."  
"I second that motion."  
"Up top." we both high five the fence like it wasn't blocking our hands. "That didn't work."  
I stick as much as my hand through the space as I can, then Dave high fives the part of my hand I managed to get through. "It's... slightly less pathetic."  
"Chain link fences ruin everything."  
"What about schools?"  
"Schools are like the chain link fences of America. Try finding one that isn't horrible in any way. It is impossible."  
"Really? But movies make them look kind of fun."  
"Movies make everything look more fun from daily life to catching on fire."  
"That is true."

"If this were a movie, I would reveal I was a secret agent or some shit, then pull out a gun and shoot the door lock. Bust us out like an action hero, fireball as we slowly walk away from the building and everything."

I look over to the door, seeing no one. "Busting out would be great right now."


	13. Chapter 13

I woke up, curled up against the chain link fencing. A look around and I'm still in the stall from yesterday, still in a puffy dress, Dave was still in the next stall over in his puffy dress, and dogs were barking not too far off. I was really hoping most of yesterday was a nightmare.  
Dave sat up slowly, frowning. "And we're still here."  
"Fucking kidding me? Can't people walk down the street without getting kidnapped? The idiocy of humans will be the death of me, which might be true at this point. They could have at least let you go."  
"Nah, they grabbed me on accident and would kill me to cover up their mess." Dave looked down the corridor. One of the gruff green suited guys came over, grumbling under his breath, with a short little guy almost completely blocked from view behind him. He had a key ring in his hand.  
"Clovers, you get the troll." The big guy stated, unlocking the stall Dave was in before handing the little guy he called Clover the keys. He dragged Dave out with quite a lot of difficulty. Before I knew it, Clover had a collar on my neck and a leash in his hand. This guy was lucky I didn't notice him doing it.  
"Let's go!"  
"Let go! Le-" I started purring uncontrollably as a hand started stroking through my hair. I couldn't seem to focus on anything.  
"It's so cute when they get cuddly!" The voice of Clover sounded.  
"St... stop it..." I was trying to keep from leaning into his hand, every time his hand ran through my hair it made it harder to resist. I am not happy with this guy knowing how to make me purr uncontrollably at a single touch. "N..." Purring cut off what I was saying.  
"That's not cool." Dave sounded from somewhere next to me. I started trying to squirm out of Clover's stupidly strong grip, only to remember I was still on a leash.  
"Shut up kid. Clover, keep the troll under control."  
"I've got him." Before I could realize what the two had planned, I couldn't resist the amazing feeling I was getting. I came around as I realized I was on my back, purring up a storm as my tail flicked lazily and one foot kicked at the air slowly.  
"Fuck no!" I scrambled to my feet, only to fall over as the big guy stomped down on the leash. I glared up at the two men with a growl escaping through my bared teeth.  
"You hold the kid, I think the troll is getting too aggressive." The big guy shoved Dave over to Clover before bending over to grab the leash. Dave landed a kick to Clover's ankles and yanked him down by the collar to knee him hard in the ribs with a sickening snap. I felt a hand on my head before a jolt of pain left my paralyzed on the floor. The big guy went to punch Dave, only for Dave to duck and land a spin kick to his face. The guy's nose streamed blood, his attention back on Dave in time to get a kick below the belt quickly followed up by another kick to the throat. He was behind the guy in the blink of an eye with a downward blow to his back. Clover and the big guy were out in a matter of seconds.  
Dave yanked me to my feet only for me to slip to my knees. "They must have done something. An- hup!" Dave managed to toss me over his shoulder. Next thing I knew we were headed down the hall.  
"Holy fuck Dave."  
"What? Carrying your fat ass or the taking out two mafia crew members?"  
"If I could move I would kick you."  
"You can kick me later." Dave skid a bit as he took a turn. I couldn't move, forced to watch all the kennel stalls, empty or occupied, as Dave bolted down the halls. It was not the best of positions to hang limply over someone's shoulder, especially when you have a long tail. "Can you stop wagging your tail?"  
"I'm not... Still can't move."  
"How are you talking then?" He skid, taking a few steps back before quickly turning.  
"I can barely do that."  
"I'm going to have to try that horn trick they used later."  
"They what?!" Quick turn, almost dropping me. I spotted someone far off down the hall. I managed to move my arm with a huge amount of effort, grabbing a tighter hold of Dave. "Any ideas on how to get out?"  
"All I can find is watched doors and high up windows. Think you could get us out through those?"  
"If I wasn't stuck like this I could." I hear something, immediately trying to look around. "Dave, crate to the left."  
Dave put me down, shoving the crate under the window before hopping up and forcing the window open. I manage to stand up on wobbling legs. "That wears of fast."  
"Aren't you glad it does?"  
"Since this window is above a drop, yes."  
With hearing the sound get closer, I hopped up onto the crate with Dave. I managed to get my wings out of my dress before hopping out the window. I managed to grab a hold of Dave and get him to the ground without dropping him. It was going to be a long trip home. I'm glad I already lost my shoes, because know I don't have to keep track of them. "Of course we're in the middle of nowhere."  
Dave started the walking. It was either really early or really late because it was still dark. Several times I had to actually hold Dave's hand and guide him through the forest like some sort of guide troll just so he wouldn't unsuspectingly fall down something or trip over plants. A few times I gently got us both down drops in the curving hillside, all the turns earlier now making sense, and sticking a decent distance from the road. This was going to take a while.

"You found them where?" Jane asked the officer.  
"They were few miles outside of town when I found them this mourning. You wouldn't believe my surprise to see a boy and a troll walking in the tree line down the hill at four in the mourning.  
They woke up again just now." I look around, noticing I was stretched out on what seemed to be a cot next to the couch Dave was on. "My partner actually recorded some of it on video with his phone." He was showing Jane the video on the human communication device. I quickly realized that I heard my voice from it. Purring.  
"Turn it off."  
"You're awake!" Jane hugged me, to which I purred uncontrollably," I didn't mean to forget you guys, I promise."  
The officer came over. "Karkat, is it?" I nodded. "Can you explain what happened?"  
"Dave and I were walking back when two burly guys in felt suits dragged us in a van. We were taken to this kennel place far out of town where there were several other animals and trolls. Dave said they might be pet smugglers. We managed to escape through a window."  
"Felt suits? What color?"  
"Green."  
"Did any of them wear something else?"  
"The lady in a black dress that looked like a jacket. I think they called her Snowman."

The officer nodded. He was gone fairly quickly. I'm still exhausted, letting my head rest on Jane's shoulder. As soon as she started running her hand through my hair I was asleep.


	14. Chapter 14

I held my ribbons in front Kankri. He looked surprised, looking over them closely. "You won?" He asked, just astounded by the fact.  
"Hell yes. I won best in show."  
"You're also getting a lot of attention." Jane noted, looking up from the computer. "The story of a candy red troll spread like wildfire. As soon as you won best in show it just went crazy!"  
"Really?"  
"Yes really. Why would I joke about this? You actually made the news!"

"I did?" I ran over, leaning over her shoulder. It was on the news section for the email site Jane used.

"Candy Red Rarity! A candy red blooded troll was the best in show at a Washington pet show, coming out of nowhere and surprising everyone... reading more_." _Jane read like she was a reporter, clicking the link at the end. It went on to say no way to track me had been left except with police officers. People are looking for me, and the article had several pictures of me from the troll show throughout it. Comments showed a list of people going nuts over it. "Hmm." Jane added a comment, got a link to her page thing on one of the sites she uses, and added it to her comment.

"I'm going to talk to my dad."

"You know you aren't supposed to go in the barn."

"I know, but it's been forever since I've seen him. Please? I'll take John with me."

"You know it's dangerous."

"Fine. I will sit and wallow about in the pathetic depths that are my life with a carton of broken-hearted and low-self-esteem swirl."

"Glad we could see eye to eye." Jane returned her focus to the computer. I stomped off to my room to do what I'm good at- sneaking out. A few moments and I was out the window and on my way to the barn.

I'm glad the pet show thing was over. I could relax at home in my usual clothes, have my hair back to the length I liked, and no fucking heels. I spotted Terezi on my way over. "What is this smell of cherries headed my way?" She smiled her tooth grin.

"Seeing as how Kankri is a major shut in afraid to leave the house, much less the shadow of his computer, it doesn't leave many choices." I was tackled over as she giggled. "Careful."

"You're always so worried! You'd think you have wings with how panic about getting pushed over." Oh shit.

"Why the hell would I have wings? Does my dad have wings? No? Then kindly shut it. I'm already enough of a mutated piece of shit without another mutation on top of it."

"So what are you doing today?"

"Going to see my dad."

"I don't think that's a good idea. It's vaccination day, so Mr. Egbert is trying to round everyone up. It's one of the few times he let's Gamzee's day off chain, you know, to try helping him gather us up. How'd it go being a show troll."

I held up my ribbons. "Won best in show. It's like the ribbon you get for being fucking fantastic in every way."

"It smells really colorful."

"It looks better than it smells, trust me."

"I don't know, it smells pretty amazing already. If it really looks that great then I need to go kick Vriska's ass again."

"You know you can't enter her stall. Besides, it wouldn't be a fair fight with her chained up."

"Hmm... I guess so. It's her own fault though. It wouldn't have gotten this far if she didn't hurt Tavros or stopped before Aradia."

"Oh, how is Aradia doing?"

"She was gone while you were on another vet visit. She is completely healed! They took off her leg and chest braces two days ago. She's back to her cheerful self."

"That's good. It was weird with her being okay with everything." I look over towards the barn. "I don't think it'll hurt to check in on everyone."

"You're so stubborn! If you go in Gamzee's dad might try to kill you."

"Well, seeing as you both are so worried, how about asking?" Mr. Egbert's voice sounded from behind us. We both spun around to face Mr. Egbert.

"Can you take me to see my dad?"

"Yes, but you need to get your shots first."

"Fine." I followed Mr. Egbert to the barn, sticking close to him. He lead me to the back first, sitting me down before getting those stupid syringes out. I looked away, waiting patiently. He was done quickly, doing Terezi really quick before standing up. I followed him down the pathway, immediately heading in when he stopped at the stall my dad stayed in.

"Karkat? You know it's dangerous to be in the barn."

"I know. I came here with Mr. Egbert."

A soft smile found it's way onto his face. "Good to hear you're being safe." He spotted the ribbons I had clipped to my pocket. "Are those show ribbons?"

"Yes."

"Can I see them?" I handed him the ribbons. He looked at them a moment. "Must have been easy to get these."

"What do you mean?"

"I didn't need to see the ribbons to know that you are beautiful. They just show that they thought so too." He smiled. I liked talking to my dad. He made me feel special.


End file.
